Francisco's Journal an author discusses the art of writing

February 19, 2016

Publication and Faith

Filed under: Faith,Publication,The Memory of Light,Writing — Francisco Stork @ 9:50 am

My book The Memory of Light was published almost a month ago and I wanted to write about what it feels like to have a book be out in the world. I hope I never lose that first-time sense of awe at having my work be available to be read by others. Publication of a book is the culmination of a process that is full of happenings that are as much or more a matter of chance and good fortune as accomplishment. So many good books, so many good writers with books that have not found the one agent, the one editor who is in tune to the book’s beauty and truth. So one of the things I always remember when a book is published is how blessed and grateful I am to have found people in this world who are willing to spend their time and effort and considerable talent in working with me on something I have written.

Authors talk about the “let down” feeling that comes after completion of a work. The purpose that kept us getting up in the morning for four years (as was the case in The Memory Light) is suddenly gone and we wake up with a now what feeling. It is usually many months from the time the last copyedits are done to the date of publication so by the time the book is published chances are the emptiness of completion has been filled by the hope of a new project. But publication is also a letting go that brings a sweet sadness not unlike what I felt when I dropped my son and then my daughter off at college for the first time. I felt sadness but also a kind of powerlessness. I wanted to continue to take care of them, watch over them, fight for them if need be. But, alas, I couldn’t. They were on their own. And so is my book.

Letting go is so hard. The advent of social media has extended the role of the author beyond the completion of the work and its publication. Here I am writing on my website about the book that’s just been published and while I hope that posts like this have value in their own right (beyond interesting you in purchasing my book), it is still an advertisement of sorts, isn’t it? The continuous role of the author beyond publication of the book is expected and accepted. But I suspect that beyond the expectation and now full social acceptance that it is okay to promote the heck out of your published work, there is reluctance on our part as authors to lose control of the process, an unwillingness to let go. There must be something I can do to lower those Amazon ratings into at least a five-digit figure! Shall I try one more Tweet?

What helped me the most when I dropped my kids off at college was faith. We all, even the most irreligious of us, have faith or faiths that we live by even it it’s the simple basic faith that the sun will rise tomorrow. I had faith in my son and my daughter, in their character and their values. I knew they would make mistakes and have their struggles but I had faith in their ability to make the right decisions. It was not a blind faith, I knew who they were. I also had a more transcendent faith that they would be guided toward a path of goodness and away from harm and evil. It is these kinds of faiths that I think are most needed after the publication of one of my books.

I have faith in the goodness and value of my books. In the case of The Memory of Light, I have faith in the ability of the book to give hope to those suffering from depression and to re-affirm the joy of hope in those who are well. The story of Vicky’s recovery from depression and suicide attempt is a story of hope and of how hope comes to a person’s anguished soul. I have faith that my hard work and the hard work of my editor resulted in a story that is readable and real. I know the character and values of the book like I knew the character and values of my children that day long ago when I pulled out of their freshman dorms. And there is still in me that other transcendent kind of faith. This other mystery-filled faith gives me the assurance that the book will find it’s way to the person who needs just this book at just this time in her or his life. And so these faiths allow me to let go of The Memory of Light full of peace. I will do what I can to bring the book and its values to others’ awareness, but I hope that my actions will be done with the peace of someone who knows that the fruits and results of his labor are no longer his responsibility. It was the trying the mattered. I have done my job. The book is in others’ hands now. It is in good hands now.

November 19, 2015

Ten Observations on Depression

Filed under: Depression/Bipolar,The Memory of Light,Writing — Francisco Stork @ 8:09 pm

As I was writing The Memory of Light (Arthur A. Levine/Scholastic, January 2016), a novel about a young girl recovering from depression and a suicide attempt, I jotted in a little notebook that I kept next to me, random thoughts and observations about depression that occurred to me as I wrote. These kind of didactic aphorisms don’t belong in a work of fiction unless you have a character that can utter them as naturally as a hummingbird hums. Yet, they are part of the musing, reflecting and imagining that happens in the process of writing a novel. I offer some of these thoughts to you in the hope that they may be of benefit to you.

  1. Because depression is part of you, hatred and anger toward it will only hurt you more. Think of depression not as an enemy to be destroyed but as an adversary to be opposed with quiet strength, like the firm but loving opposition to a child’s dangerous whim.
  2. Depression may be a part of you but it is not the whole of you. Nor is depression the part of you that is in charge. The part of you that feels and recognizes the symptoms of depression is the part of you that runs the show.
  3. You don’t think you’re worthless because you have an infection on your leg but often you do when you have depression. What’s the difference? In the case of depression the thoughts of worthlessness are the infection.
  4. Just because depression has a chemical and biological component doesn’t mean that there aren’t good reasons in your life for you to be depressed. A fever tells you there’s something wrong in your body. Depression sometimes tells you there’s something wrong in your body and in your life.
  5. If you have a friend who will go bowling with you or to a movie or window-shopping or do anything where dialogue is optional but not expected, count yourself extremely fortunate.
  6. You’ll know you’re getting better when you notice yourself getting angry at the incredible number of jerks that populate our world. Know that the anger you’ve lived with for so long is making a U-Turn.
  7. There are many things you will dislike doing when you have depression. Figure out which ones you can stop doing (going to cocktail parties or other social functions dominated by small-talk) and which ones you need to do even if you don’t feel like doing them (going for quiet walks, showering, being kind to your spouse, being useful to others, as best you can).
  8. Remind yourself now and then that like all mental illnesses, depression distorts your perception of reality and your reaction to it. A friend that doesn’t call doesn’t mean that you’re unloved by everyone or unlovable.
  9. Listen to Music. Put your earphones on and really listen. Let the music dissolve all thought. Become the music. Your depression will guide you to the right music. There are times when music will save your life.
  10. Depression doesn’t make you more intuitive, more sensitive, more spiritual, a better artist. You are not a better person just because you hate yourself for thinking you are a better person. If you are lucky depression will teach you that you are an ordinary human being blessed with the gift of life. And if you are okay with that, you are on your way to being healed.

October 22, 2015

Writing that Opens Windows

Filed under: Inspiration,Integrity,Religion,Rumi,Writing — Francisco Stork @ 8:14 am

To open up windows is the function of religion, says Rumi, the wonderful Persian poet. And I would add of writing as well. But how? What kind of writing opens up windows? So much of what we write simply repeats what is in the windowless rooms of our reader’s mind. So much of what we write does not open up a window to something new or something valuable that has been forgotten. Writing that opens up windows gives a new perspective to a reality that in many ways has been shaped by others in predictable ways. A reality that has been shaped since childhood by ancient prejudices and fears, by commercial expectations of success, by the media. So when you write, ask yourself if you are opening windows or whether you are simply reinforcing in the reader what is already there. Writing that opens windows is more than a metaphor – it is a practice, a technique, a decision that is made before you start to write and constantly as you progress in your work. There are innumerable places when your story can go in one direction or another, when your character can be this way or that, when you can choose to say or not say something. Writing that opens windows then becomes an ever-present, bold search for the unpredictable, a struggle to shift the reader’s perception toward some new way of seeing and feeling and understanding. Writing that opens windows arises ultimately from the writer’s recognition that art is capable of feeding the hunger for meaning that exists in the reader’s soul, or at the very least, awaken it. Art helps us live. It gives meaning and solace and hope to our lives. Writing that opens windows allows the reader to look out and be a part of a larger world. It lets the reader know that she is not alone with her yearning for truth and beauty. But writing that opens windows also lets light in. When writing opens a window it becomes a vehicle for grace. It allows grace to enter a person’s heart. Grace can have a divine origin if you are religious, like Rumi, or it can simply be the gratitude for living that life bestows to anyone open to it. Finally, writing that opens windows can only happen if the writer opens windows in his or her heart. That’s the ethic, the responsibility, the integrity of this type of writing. Your writing will open windows in the reader’s life to the extent that you open windows in yours.

« Newer Posts — Older Posts »

Powered by WordPress